Rosemary

I was waiting in the church waiting for my turn to enter the confession room and meet the priest. Yes, I did a big sin… maybe it wasn’t huge for the others. It was normal but for me, it was the worst I have ever done in my life ever.

I wanted to clean myself, I wanted to ask God for forgiveness. I didn’t know what I should do or to whom I should talk. Except for going to the church. Somehow I was afraid to go to the church next to my house or in another meaning to the church that I used to attend and pray to god.

Because every single one in this church knows who I am and who my parents are. I didn’t want to make a scandal or fuss in my family. I was scared of my parents' reactions if they found out what I had done.

That’s why I decided to go somewhere else. A church far away from my house. In a deserted but nice place but not in the town.

I couldn’t know if that was right or wrong. But I took the bus and there was no coming back. To everyone I looked mature, no one expected that I was just in high school ever. That was something that bothered me a lot because too many guys and men chased me for that. If they didn’t know my real age… oh god! They wouldn’t even talk to me. I was underage. Under my parents' custody. I was just 16 years old.

And according to my experience in life it was zero percent. But god gifted me with a sexy hot body that for some reason was like a curse for me.

Even that day, when I chose this church, I just opened the map and chose a place that I didn't go to before or visited ever with my family. That's it and I was there sitting outside waiting for what could be next.

But when the priest shouted for next. I flinched and hopped off my chair thinking of going back to my house. But something halted me. A weird feeling as if I was pushed to meet that priest.

“Next!” the priest called from behind the door.

I hesitantly walked inside. His eyes stared at me widely, something about him was strange. Not just because he was so young in his late twenties. But he reminded me of that guy from the bar!

He motioned to me to come closer and have a seat. I stepped slower and by every move of mine, I got a clearer view of his face and his body. Even so, he wasn’t naked or something. But from his hands and too wide shoulders, it was so obvious he got the whole package of a hot muscular man.

I snapped to myself from my evil thoughts because of what I was thinking about him. I was there to confess and ask for forgiveness for what I did. How could I think of the father like that?!

I gulped “father.” I fiddled with my fingers nervously forcing myself to lower my gaze to my lap to not meet his gorgeous pearly blue eyes.

He coughed “yes, what’s your name?” he asked me firmly.

I pulled a strand of my hair back to my ear “I’m Rosemary, father.” I replied politely.

“Okay, then look at me,” he commanded me firmly which was weird. I couldn’t raise my head to him. I just shook my head as no.

Until I felt a warm big hand touching my cheeks gently, I raised my head immediately in a shock and blinked “father!”

He smiled then, he walked away from me “you have gorgeous eyes, why are you trying to hide those from me?” he grinned sheepishly.

What he was doing to me for god sake?! this is very weird!

I dropped my jaw speechless, I couldn’t find a word to say in his presence. He started then “okay, rose. Can I call you rose?” he asked me gently and I nodded shyly avoiding eye contact with him.

“good girl, then tell me why are you here?” he asked me and when he finished his question, I couldn’t hold my tears back. It just rolled as heavy rain down to my cheeks.

He stood up and rushed to me instantly, I could hear his stomping footsteps coming closer and closer until he was almost standing in front of my chair and his knees brushing my knees.

I cleared my throat nervously moving up by my head to meet his face “I’m sorry.” I apologized for nothing at all.

I wiped my tears with my hands and sobbed “father, I made a horrible mistake. A very big sin.” I started to shiver and slightly raised my voice. I was blaming myself for what I did for almost a week until I decided finally to talk with a priest to tell me what to do.

He tapped my shoulder gently “I wonder what a girl like you could do?” I don’t know if he was making fun of me or smirking! But he didn’t look as if he was taking me as a serious matter.

I stood up slipping my body away from him “I _ I seriously, made a sin… I kissed a man.” I stuttered gazing at him angrily, feeling disgusted by what I did.

He widened his eyes “what?! tell me more.” he asked me.

I narrowed my eyes and blinked “what? That was it! I kissed a man.” I said slowly emphasizing every word coming out of my mouth.

He laughed hysterically then out of the blue grimaced and shot me with death glare “are you making fun of me?” he shouted.

I startled a bit and stepped back a few inches, I shook my head “no, I swear.”

He stepped closer from me hurriedly making my heart skip some beats. I thought he was going to punish me or slap my face or beat me or something. He looked at me with scary looks that made me stiffened.

“Father,” I exclaimed to stop him from coming any closer.

He pulled me to his chest without any prior notice and whispered huskily in my ear “are you virgin?”

I trembled and zipped my mouth in a hard shock from his question. He wasn’t just interfering in my personal life but he was touching me. I could feel his other hand moving from down my waist up to my hair slowly.

I shivered under his touch “yes, I swear.”

He inhaled and exhaled loudly that made me feel his warm breath over my neck. His affection over my body was totally different. I have never felt so before in my whole life.

He pulled himself away from me and walked back to his chair “get out now! I don’t want to see your face ever again!” he yelled at me out of blue.

But he didn’t stop at that point, he repeated his sentence again with a louder shout. I hopped off my place dumbfounded then I turned my body immediately towards the door to do what he just said.

But his words made me frozen in my place “do you want to be a nun?”

I breathed highly trying to process what he just said, but I couldn’t… I twirled my body to glare at him with questionable eyes.

He nodded reassuringly that he just muttered “yes, do you want to be a nun as atonement for your sins?! For me you look like a whore. I don’t believe that you are virgin and moreover I think you seduced that man to kiss you. So, what’s your decision?” he crossed his arms over his chest and asked me with harsh and accusing words.

But… I couldn’t say no… to make the aches inside my chest fade, I just figured out that I have no choice but to accept what he said.

I raised an eyebrow and said confidently “yes, I do.”